From the Urban Myths Mailbag

Dear Urban Myths,

I have been involved with a fellow for almost four years. He is supposedly attractive and talented but I don't see it. I have tried so hard to keep him with me. I have given him fame, fortune and access to a life he only dreamed about. I even bought him a child to keep our family together. My problem is I am not sure I want to keep doing this but I like that I am keeping myself popular. What should I do?

Famously Fading

Dear FF,

You give a man fame and fortune, dinner with moguls and prime ministers, rides on private planes and big boats. Why are you doing this? To keep yourself popular? That's crazy. Aren't you happy? Is he happy?

If you build a life that is built on a foundation of things, money and a false sense of reality, when it collapses you have no one to blame but yourself. You can't buy another human being, even a fellow narcissist, because eventually fame, like every other kind of drug, you have to get a better stronger fix. What can you give him in the future? An aging facade and a failing career? He will move on, as you should expect, because you can't offer him anything. Even if he bought all of the things you were selling he will be susceptible to a younger, prettier, even more popular and wealthier vendor. Cut your losses and think about your future. That's the most important thing isn't it?

UM