Friday, October 23, 2009

Another Day in the Life of the Urbans


NK: The paps are here...quick, give me a nuzzle.

Keith: I don't have my heels on...how can I reach?

NK: I don't care how you do it, just make it happen.

Keith: Good lord, you've got your arm around my neck so tight, I'm having to stand on my tip toes to prevent a choke hold.

NK: Whatever. Put your hand on my ass.

Keith: What? Are you serious?

NK: Do it, for God's sake. Do you need a map?

Keith: Lord help me...alright. It's there...but on the count of five, it comes off.

NK: As long as they get a picture, I don't care how long it's there.

Keith: Crikey, that has to be worth something.

NK: Fine...another million dollars at the end of the contract, if you put your hand on my ass on command.

47 comments:

Tara said...

These all seem to be so staged anymore don't they. I hope he didn't strain anything trying to give her effected affection.

Anonymous said...

Couldn't pass this one up. Keith looks like this is his first attempt at touching a girl's ass. And then she gets him in a headlock! This is how they show the world how sexy they are? It seems neither one of them can act.

maclen said...

Yeah, you can now scratch "class" or "dignity"...certainly "discretion" from the orb's traits, huh? Seems once upon a time it was the impression that the orb was not at all confortable with kidman's blatant play up to the paps and her lame photo ops! Seems the flop of his cd has changed his outlook on vulgar PDA's for the sake of the paps!

maclen said...

...ps...

...that reminds me...I was going to post this yesterday, but then kidman's ditching her "Honorary Ambassadorship to the UN" committment of the press reception trumped this!
So now here, another edition of "The orb's CD chart action"...it seems cletus' cd had some actual movement this past week! "Defying Sales" moves from #76 to....#73? Three spots? Well, that's another 4 or 5k cds sold to the total, eh? Meanwhile my CMA's "Dark Horse" and the latest guage to measure the orb's career, taylor swift's cds did phenomenally well this past week. Her previous cd, "taylor swift" jumped an astonishing 12 spots from #71 to #59, and her current cd moved 10 spots from #17 back into the top ten at #7! As it is in all of the music biz, your only as good as your current LP...your either a hit...or a miss..the cletus is a miss...again.

Anonymous said...

Ah, "too lazy to do fact-finding" and "totally clueless about statistics" Maclen: you omitted the following latest happenings:

- Keith's single "Only You Can Love Me This Way" is #1 on the Mediabase and Billboard charts. (oops, that's right, you wouldn't know what this means as you are totally clueless!)

- Paisley just performed at the Madison Square Garden on Wednesday night, and he was not able to sell out the arena despite offering many tickets at the bargain price of 4 tix for $99. So much for your convoluted and nonsensical attempt at "statistical ANALysis" that "paisley has had 60% more people see him live than Keith". (as posted by clueless Maclen on Oct. 8, 2009) Better check the facts and figures, Maclen!

- As to the remainder of Paisley’s tour, he’s performing at the Bryce Jordan Center tonight. Even with the college kids already back in town, he still cannot pack that arena. As of this morning, there were tickets available in the lower risers through Ticketmaster.

- Tomorrow, Paisley will be at Mohegan Sun. He’s only doing one show there, compared to Urban doing two shows a few months ago.. As of now, you can still find tickets to Paisley’s show in the lower risers 6th row, close to the stage. That’s right, even at the ticket price of $75 (compared to way over $100 for the KU tix), Paisley could not sell out the Lower –section, something KU had no problem doing in his two shows. So, Maclen, you need to rethink your “statistical ANALysis”.

maclen said...

HA! Check out kidman's press releases over at JJ and GG!

http://justjared.buzznet.com/2009/10/23/keith-urban-nicole-kidman-starbucks-squeeze/

Keith Urban & Nicole Kidman: Starbucks Squeeze

(Hey, get a load of the cletus' idiotic smile in the pic on the right on JJ's site...you think he spiked his starbucks java for a little "extra" pick me up and to get into the mood?!)

http://www.celebrity-gossip.net/celebrities/hollywood/nicole-kidman-and-keith-urban-madly-in-love-212490/

Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban: Madly in Love

Get this, JJ claims the pics were from the 21st...but GG says they are from the 18th! I noticed these pics posted by the NKUsers yesterday from a seperate site than jj or gg and they also claim it was from the 18th! either way they are from kidman's pre- hearing meltdown...so I wonder why they are only now being posted by kidman press releasers jj and gg 5 whole days later? Kidman needs a PR "pick me up" after her horrendous appearence in DC! What inept and lame amateurs! Yes, kidman and cletus PR BS at it's most redundantly ineffecive! I rate it an "EPIC FAIL!"

maclen said...

HA!HA!HA!

check out the whole series of cletus (flying high as a kite) orb!

http://justjared.buzznet.com/photo-gallery/2308841/nicole-kidman-keith-urban-pat-01/

http://justjared.buzznet.com/photo-gallery/2308901/nicole-kidman-keith-urban-pat-07/

http://justjared.buzznet.com/photo-gallery/2308911/nicole-kidman-keith-urban-pat-08/

http://justjared.buzznet.com/photo-gallery/2308921/nicole-kidman-keith-urban-pat-09/

...do you think the orb even knows where he is! Is he flying higher than the "bubble boy"...is he even listening to what kidman is blathering about?! Yeah, great hairdo there cletus, thats a pretty lame ass and weak imitation of the "mop top"... but at least the beatles combed theirs!! Smile like a dimwit for the paps...your cd is dead...but you have to parade it like you were relevant now more than ever!

maclen said...

So, another case of late night musings... I was just scoping the nets, when I read that charlize theron, fresh off of shedding off the prospect of being immersed in an over wash of pretensiousness and most certainly a overindulgance of endless closeup's for a physically and emotionally inacapable actor...in other words a kidman produced flick... was in the running to be in the new mad max flick which is to be filmed in OZ. Of course, mad max famously starred aussie mel gibson, but since his meltdown a few years ago in his tirade of anti semitism and sexism...there is no decision yet if he is even be in the new film. Now word is that aussie Sam Worthington may get the title role. And the thought crossed my mind...an aussie flick, with former star aussie gibson and now aussie worthington now considered for the role, and it being filmed in OZ...why theron...and not maybe kidman is up for this flick? And of course, the answer is very clear...after "Australia", I doubt if anyone is gonna consider another big budget "all" aussie flick...and especially not with kidman in it! Basically, gibson probably blew it when he so drunkenly revealed himself to be such a nutcase...as all "holocaust deniers" seem to be after all...kidman did it less dramatically and over a longer period of time...with flop after flop after flop....after flop! Besides, kidman cant do action...just as she cant do comedy...she cant even do light romantic comedy...she has no personality...or warmth...or natural humor...shes a walking talking mannequin! And she proved she cant do action flicks back in 2003 when she dropped out of mr and mrs smith, whose role angelina jolie took over, and coincidently I also read, jolie may take over another role theron also passed on, an action film called the tourist. Basically, kidman seems to NOT be up or wanted for any films, except the a few backlogs of flicks already announced years before...and of which, she will have to make herself if she is to star! So basically, what this comes down to for me is...will theron be in principle photography on this big budget mad max flick before kidman can get her paltry indie flick into principle photography? We shall of course...see.

Imahick said...

I think NK's career is declining pretty quickly, largely because of the way her face has been impacted by her "natural" approaches. If only she'd had lip enhancements and botox, I'm sure she could have saved it (just joking).

I believe that she is an adequate actor with limitations in regards to what roles she CAN take on successfully. She is physically too tall and oddly shaped for many roles. She definitely looks out of place in action movies. She is best in the drama \ serious type movies. Obviously ... she's no comedic actor ... that's a no brainer.

I think she will have to keep doing indie movies if she wants to lead, or be satisfied with small supporting roles. And right now, I think she is struggling to find a way "out" of the spiral and back up onto the top.

maclen said...

And basically, kidman, trying to
change things up in regards to her failed career...thought that by going "political" she could add some kind of added dimension! But instead, inadvertently...and hysterically she pulled an "alec baldwin!" Baldwin for years upon years tried to hack it as a "leading actor" in lalaland..when it didnt pan out for him, he turned around and railed about the whole "hollywood system"...and that he didnt want to play "that" game anymore... or continue to "degrade" himself with it! But as then was clearly shown, his out of control temper...the low class turmoil in his marriage and subsequent tabloid feeding divorce...he more than likely blew that all on his own! Now kidman, as I mentioned, stepped into it inadvertently...I seriously doubted she had any strategy going into testifying at a congressional hearing other than reading her canned statements and statistics she has no first hand knowledge of, recall...and getting the photo ops and press attention! Proof of it of course is when the question of whether Hollywood contributes to a "stereotypical" and therefore "demeaning" attitude towards woman, she simply agreed but then tried to push away any blame on herself! She then ran away from any potential follow up questions, and I doubt if she will ever take any more questions on the hill! The lame "photo ops" simply for the sake of the press coverage will continue, I'm sure!

Anonymous said...

I see self-professed “statistical fiend but totally clueless about what the numbers mean" Maclen has been quiet about the latest Pollstar Top 20 Concert Tours.

Maclen posted his “statistical ANALysis” of the Top 20 Concert Tours on Oct. 8, citing the following: http://www.google.com/hostednews/canadianpress/article/ALeqM5iUkvig47D93Ny-zfon_8MlWhbKvg <- Note the date of this article is Oct. 7.
2. (2) Kenny Chesney; $1,482,184; $68.54.
14. (14) Keith Urban; $659,445; $61.64.
15. (15) Brad Paisley; $609,348; $37.38.
18. (19) Taylor Swift; $557,505; $50.39.


A more current list from Pollstar as of Oct. 21 shows the following:
5. (5) Kenny Chesney; $1,408,937; $67.75
12. (12) Keith Urban; $794,636; $62.79
16. (17) Brad Paisley; $615,273; $37.80.
19. (20) Taylor Swift; $559,707; $49.94.
Ref: http://www.nj.com/newsflash/index.ssf?/base/entertainment-11/1256181718189400.xml&storylist=entertainment&thispage=1

Ha! In a matter of two weeks, Chesney dropped from #2 to #5, Paisley dropped from #15 to #16, and Taylor Swift dropped from #18 to #19. Keith moved up from #14 to #12, and the only one of the four to show a sharp increase in box office gross! Okay, Maclen, you still want to talk about your “statistical ANALysis” nonsense? Lmao!

Anonymous said...

Are these numbers reliable? Looks like Kenny is giving refunds. I wonder how much Keith depends on the artists touring with him to fill stadiums??

Not a fan of Paisley but he does make the news. Wasn't he just on the cover of People magazine, not once but twice in a couple of weeks time? And didn't I read that he just gave a new truck to his one millionth ticket holder? Oh yeah, and isn't he creating and co-producing a TV show?

And Keith, well hes got one thing over them all, hes the biggest "tabloid" celebrity in country music! Think that will get him ETOY?

maclen said...

Well, this article almost gets it right...correct on the fiasco of the failed attempt at getting "political" and the hilarious ensueing hypocrisy... but I would beg to differ of course on the "brilliant" aspect of it!
http://www.independent.co.uk/opinion/commentators/janet-street-porter/editoratlarge-nicoles-sex-roles--betray-women-in-the-real-world-1808989.html

Editor-At-Large: Nicole's sex roles betray women in the real world

"On the face of it, Nicole Kidman would seem to be a rum choice to be talking about violence against women. After all, she's been raped in one film (Dogville), and had kinky sex with Tom Cruise in another (Eyes Wide Shut). She had a bath with a rather young boy (in Birth) and shagged Billy Zane in Dead Calm, her Hollywood debut – all in the name of art, of course. But Nicole isn't just a highly successful actress who's managed her career so brilliantly she now earns over £7m a film; she's decided to do her bit for the less fortunate by becoming a "goodwill ambassador" for the UN Development Fund for Women."

...I would put it, "She "brilliantly" latched onto cruise" thereby inflating her mediocre career and cashed in when he dumped her! The only thing she's done on her own since then has "brilliantly" ground her mediocre career out of the mainstream! And driven the orb's career to the unspectacular new lows as her own for good measure! But back to the self prolaimed "Cinematic Joan of Ark" and her "self engrandizing" on her so called "personal purity" on the isue of "postive role models" ...and I would only add to all the past comments I've made about it...
it is "deliciously" ironic... and might I say "satisfyingly" serendipitous that as kidman sheds her crocodile tears for the congressional camera's and photographers for the equal rights and the call for "dignity" and "respect' for woman across the world, (all of which she doesnt visit or has never met!)...there are promo PR photo ops released immmediately following her dismal appearence in DC of her main dude, "cletus the slack jawed yokel" publically groping her boney ass for the benefit of the paps to flash them all across the world! Imagine, those unfortunate teen and tween young women across the 3rd world countries kidman claims to be so concerned about...are fortunate to come by current technology...like the internet...and want to look up their "savior and defender"...kidman..and stumble upon those pics of "high as a kite" cletus groping kidman in public like some kind of drunken teen punk! Or as the article above points out...kidman being raped in Dogville...having kinky sex in EWS...taking a bath with a 10 year old in Birth...and etc.
But, I think this quote from the article says it best...

"But using Nicole Kidman to front a campaign – no matter how worthwhile – really does call into question the whole dubious notion of goodwill ambassadors."

...to which I say...AMEN!

Anonymous said...

Mikki: I hope you did not attend the same "Statistical ANALysis" class as Maclen. :)

"Are these numbers reliable?"
They are from the exact same source (Pollstar) used by Maclen in his previous post. Funny how you did not question him then.

"Looks like Kenny is giving refunds."
Is that all you could think of? Couldn't it be because his later shows have lower priced tickets, or that he made more of the lower priced tickets available, hence that dropped his latest average ticket price number?

"I wonder how much Keith depends on the artists touring with him to fill stadiums?"
Funny you don't ask the same question about Kenny, Brad and Taylor. You also need to do some fact-finding. Keith hardly does any stadium shows, while Kenny's shows are almost all stadium shows. And yes, Kenny totally depends on the opening acts to help him fill the stadiums.

“Not a fan of Paisley but he does make the news. Wasn't he just on the cover of People magazine, not once but twice in a couple of weeks time?”
Of course he’ll get the coverage from People magazine after he dragged out his whole family to pose for a photoshoot. Paisley did not hesitate to use his kids for PR.

“Oh yeah, and isn't he creating and co-producing a TV show?”
And your point is ….???
To me, that’s just another proof that Paisley has completely “gone Hollywood” for quite some time now. He simply uses a cowboy hat to fake a “country music artist” persona.

And you’re wrong about the “the biggest "tabloid" celebrity in country music. That “honor” goes to Miley Cyrus, closely followed by Taylor Swift.

maclen said...

mikki said...
"Are these numbers reliable? Looks like Kenny is giving refunds. I wonder how much Keith depends on the artists touring with him to fill stadiums??"..."And didn't I read that he just gave a new truck to his one millionth ticket holder?"

Paisley gave away a truck to one on his fans? Well....I remember reading that the orb gave away a...guitar?...to a fan? (Cletus probably even took up a collection from the band to buy one!)
As to the "numbers" mikki, there independent numbers...stats and numbers. averages...as the site states, "The Top 20 Concert Tours ranks artists by average box office gross per city and includes the average ticket price for shows in North America." You can take them with a grain of salt...or completely disregard them. But, as I've pointed out in the past on these "averages"... cletus doesnt fare as well as chesney of course...or for paisley. The main number to look at of course is ATP..."average ticket price." cletus is charging more for his "average" ticket prices than paisley and swift...and again, they show that more people are actually, on average, remember.... are going to see paisley...and of course, chesney...more than the cletus! Based on these updated stats...16,277 people saw paisley in this chart...12,655 saw the orb...and 11,207 for swift. Now again, cletus charges an average of $62.79 per ticket...paisley charges $37.80...and swift charges $49.94! Now, logically, if paisley and swift were charging their fans the $62.79 per ticket average that the orb was charging his fans...paisley would have made $1mil and swift would have made $706k. And further note...cletus' ticket price, $62.78 are almost as much as chesney's $67.75..only a $5 difference...yet chesney is grossing on average, twice as much as orb! The numbers dont look so great for the fansies now, do they! Cletus has been "underperforming" for the past 4 years...on cd sales..or live touring it would seem. Cletus doesnt lead in anything...cd sales...live touring...or even the CMA nominations...he only leads in the opinion that he is the "best performer in county"...by his own fans! But of course, Chesney's fans believe chesney is... swift fans believe she is....and etc...I seriously doubt if winning "Entertainer" at the CMA's is gonna fix..or stop... his decline!

maclen said...

..ps...

...back on the subject...I find it humorous...laughably humorous, in fact...that the orb thought he could charge on average about as much as chesney for his live tickets...orbs $62 to chesney"s $67... YET is only grossing on average 795k to chesney's $1.4mil!...Half the amount, remember! Well, so much for "guitar hero' cletus' attraction to concert goers, eh? And of course, his sales of only about 580k copies of "Defying Sales" sold tells you all you need to know about why, doesnt it? Now, even a "country" layman like myself is well aware that paisley... and certainly the red hot...taylor "4 to 5 million cds sold this year alone" swift apparently kept their ticket prices lower in consideration of their fans...unlike the orb who is soooo desperate to make all the extra "chunk of change" he can, considering his cd is a flop! Yes...all about them, the fansies are flopping for something...any little thread they can cling to...to hold back that massive wall of signs and indications that their country bumpkin crooner's career is totally getting flushed down the drain! I mean, what will his remaining fans do if he doesnt take "entertainer" at the CMA's? Even after the "Keith URban Benefit...with friends"? Will they...NOT... buy his current cd again?!

Anonymous said...

Thanks for clearing that up Maclen. And I agree, winning "Entertainer" is no quick fix. As you have pointed out in the past, his CD sales have been on the decline since hooking up with Kidman. In the end, all he'll have left is his "trophy" wife.

Anonymous said...

‘Maclen said …The main number to look at of course is ATP..."average ticket price."’
...which you obviously have problem understanding, Maclen.

Your interpretation that Paisley “has an average of 60% more audience than Urban” is too laughable for words. Where did you study Statistics again? Must be at the “School for the Deranged” or “School for the Clueless”.

Since Urban almost always sold out his arena shows, and Paisley pretty much performed at the same or smaller venues, for Paisley to get “60% more audience” meant the arenas would have had to break all kinds of fire codes to let more people in (fat chance of that happening!) or start charging the “overflow crowd” on the street viewing a telecast of the show inside the arena. That has never happened yet!

Yup, the ATP numbers are quite telling. No surprise of course that Chesney has a high ATP as his stadium shows usually have 2 to 3 superstar acts opening for him. Urban’s high ATP means people are willing to pay much more to see him perform live than Paisley or Swift. End of story.

As I said in a previous post, you still want to talk about your “statistical ANALsis”, Maclen? Bring it on!

maclen said...

mikki said...
"Thanks for clearing that up Maclen. And I agree, winning "Entertainer" is no quick fix. As you have pointed out in the past, his CD sales have been on the decline since hooking up with Kidman. In the end, all he'll have left is his "trophy" wife."

And, appparently mikki, all kidman will have is orb, and attending the one or two concert gigs of his that she barely stays awake for! As for the CMA award, it wont be a fix, win or lose...I mean it is simply just another award show...of many...but to the celebs of course, it just another tool for promotion...and therefore for cd sales. And it's just my opinion, in the orbs current position, his cd has only sold just over half a mill...now if he does win "entertainer" will it mean he will then, and only then...reach a million cds sold? And if he doesnt win he doesn't reach it? Now of course the no win postition I see for the orb is even if he reaches say a million cds sold...that is still only half of his last cd. but everything I've seen...observed...and analysed...My money is that he doesnt win and is cd doesnt even make it a million cds sold. I mean, certainly if swift does take Entertainer, it will be for the phenomenal year she's had in cd sales. If chesney takes it, its because his is the most successful concert tour...paisley I dont know much of in the biz...maybe if he takes it, it's because it is his turn! Only when the awards are finally given out, we shall know what the situation was for that win! But either way, it doesnt look good for the orb!...in my opinion of course!

Anonymous said...

Well Maclen, I know his faithful followers think that he has finally decided to put some effort into his career this time around and so he should be rewarded with the top prize. They base that solely on his appearances and touring. But they can't justify the lack of CD sales other than to blame the economy. Well perhaps sales would be down slightly but certainly not down as bad as they are for Keith who's numbers will end up half of what they were for his last CD (if hes lucky). So, as you say we'll have to see who wins in the end. But if its Keith, he won't get a boost to his career, only his ego.

Anonymous said...

ps....
I don't see winning "entertainer" doing any more for his career than winning the oscar did for Kidman's. She was never a box office draw and winning didn't cause anyone to buy a ticket to her films. So why would a win for him increase his sales? The fans he has (left) have already bought his CD. I don't think fans are waiting for a win before they invest in his CD, do you? As a matter of fact, I'm guessing that if he does win it will be as controversial as Kidman's win to some just because his sales are at an all time low for him.

maclen said...

Ha Ha! too funny!

When you "crunch the numbers"...you use the "numbers" your provided with...and then simply apply the basic formulas and basic math to reach your conclusions. You should not include your own idiotic bias...and totally "unsubstanciated opinions"...ie:"Since Urban almost always sold out his arena shows, and Paisley pretty much performed at the same or smaller venues" So, you see what I mean, folks? How many arenas did the orb exactly "sell" out? And how does "that" fit into the calculations of the numbers provided? And how many "smaller venues" did paisley play as opposed to the orb? And where does that calculation show up in the stats of the charts posted? Look, let me just simplify it for the truly clueless! If, as this weeks charts of average grosses for the live gigs shows...cletus grossed an average of $795k...and the average price of his tickets is $62.79...basic math tells you clearly that: 12,655 people paid $62.79 each to see the orb live. Again, simplified for the clueless...you can use two seperate calculations! (rounding up...$795k divided by $62.79= 12,655 paid customers. You want to double check that...12,655 (people) multiplied by $62.79 (ATP)= $794,984 total gross) Now if you want to skew the simple numbers...and claim some "unsubstanciated" opinion that...the orb "almost always sold out all his gigs"...and "probably" sold more tickets...knock your totally deluded mind out! And so again, the numbers provided show that paisley grossed $615K...with an ATP of $37.80...(615k divided by $37.80= 16,269 paid customers...again, 16,269 customers multiplied by $37.80= $615k. And again, if some deluded idiot wants to make some unsubstanciated claim that...maybe some of paisley's tickets were scalped for much higher prices and therefore his gross is "inflated"... be my guest...but the numbers provided are not going to take any of that for consideration...its simple math, not speculation that only exists in some clueless fan's mind! And let me address another error made by a clueless fansie...quote: "Your interpretation that Paisley “has an average of 60% more audience than Urban”... I made no claim or interpretation...I posted the actual audience numbers based on the numbers provided... the calculations are up above... look at the numbers...paisley had 16,269 paid customers for this charts stats...and cletus had 12,655 paid customers! Now, not even bothering to calculate it... paisley did NOT "have an average of 60% more audience than Urban"..and clearly the numbers I calculated show that. More simply, IF paisly in fact did have 60% more audience than cletus...paisley would of then had around 25,000 paying customers and not the 16,269! But that is WRONG and I never claimed it. I guess the confusion for the deluded fansie came when I calculated, using basic math again, what Paisely could have grossed if he in fact had charged what the orb charged for his tickets. So now in conclusion, class...Paisely's known audience, based on the numbers provided, 16,296 customers multiplied by $62.79 (cletus' ATP)= $1.02mil. Again, to make it clear, that's only IF paisley had charged the 62 bucks that cletus had charged...and not the 37 bucks he actually charged. So, class, to give you an interesting stat to chew on...

How much money would the orb had grossed if he had charged the $37.80 that paisley had sold his tickets, using the numbers provided by the chart?

Extra credit for the correct answer! Double secret credit if your an orb fansie!

This is too much fun!

maclen said...

mikki said...
"Well Maclen, I know his faithful followers think that he has finally decided to put some effort into his career this time around and so he should be rewarded with the top prize."

Yeah, mikki, of course everyone has their own opinion. And I've been here a few years and seen the ebbs and flows of opinion. Yeah, in my opinion the plain fact is in show biz, money talks louder than words. ... so Capital Nashville cannot be too happy with the orbs cd sales... so I wouldnt be surprised if it was a longer period before the orb comes out with another cd...an original cd! But would CapNash come out with another orb Greatest hits cd to try an recoup some of the money blown by the "defying sales" cd...just as they did for the "whole crazy" cd? Absolutely possible...when money, or the lack of any talks...sure! And you are right, a CMA would only be good for promotion...but the figures show nobody aint buying!

maclen said...

So, here's another interesting article to add to the tapestry I'm constantly weaving on this blog...

http://emac.blogs.foxbusiness.com/2009/10/23/country-music-is-the-new-rock-%E2%80%98n-roll/

Country Music Is the New Rock ‘n Roll

...now, clearly...here's an opinion piece that surely the "Guitar Hero" himself, cletus orb is surely the inspiration for, eh? How can it not be, clearly... lets delve in, shall we?

"A general consensus is forming in the music industry:...Country music is displacing rock ‘n roll as America's most popular brand of music....Now, why is it that country music could be displacing rock 'n roll in popularity in the US?...

"Could it be that music listeners are sick and tired of the fulsome, industrial-strength self-dramatization, the twisted acting out in rock ‘n roll songs that take on a relentless, infantile, perverse logic all their own?"

"Like Elvis (the Hillbilly Cat), and Garth Brooks, other country music stars have also crossed over to rock ‘n roll, including Shania Twain, Hank Williams, Dwight Yoakam, Brooks & Dunn, and, of course, Parton."

"Country rock can also claim such stars as Lynyrd Skynyrd, the Allman Brothers, the Charlie Daniels Band, Marshall Tucker, Alabama, The Byrds, Neil Young, the Grateful Dead, The Eagles, and also Poco and Buffalo Springfield. Of course, who can forget songs from The Rolling Stones such as "Honky Tonk Women" and "Dead Flowers?”

"In 2008, based upon total earnings, three of the top 10 acts were country--namely, Kenny Chesney, Rascal Flatts and Toby Keith, according to Forbes Magazine;"

"The Billboard charts for 2008, based upon the number of titles appearing on the charts, lists country music stars Taylor Swift at number five, Miley Cyrus at number seven, Carrie Underwood at number 13, and Sugarland at number 21;"

"Two country acts had albums in the top 10 in 2008: Garth Brooks and Taylor Swift;"

"The highest grossing musical tours for 2008 included Kenny Chesney, who was number four ($72.2 mn) and Rascal Flatts at number eight ($55.8 mn), according to Pollstar, a publication that tracks music tours;"

"Last month, Swift became the first country artist to win an MTV music video award, and her song "You Belong With Me" is the first country crossover to top the Billboard Hot 100 Radio Chart, since Nielsen-BDS has monitored such data in 1990."

"The top selling album this year is Taylor Swift, at 1.3 mn units;"

...well, my mistake, the orb isnt mentioned at all in this piece! He obviously didnt make the cross over to "Pop"...or into "rock n roll" either! But he is in "Country"...right?

hoosierlady said...

There is the argument that the contemporary entertainers mentioned above are not "country", that would be more along the lines of, say, Roseanne Cash, Shooter Jennings, Tricephus, ect.

If that is considered, I would say Cletus is lightyears away from anything remotely "country".

maclen said...

hoosierlady said...
"If that is considered, I would say Cletus is lightyears away from anything remotely "country"

Clearly orb tried to "expand" his appeal, hoosier. You know the pieces..."Is he rock now?" "Does he have "pop appeal?" But what it only does, when they are flailing due to a stagnant career, is simply dillute their overall appeal, which you can clearly see with the orb. Most of the "crossover" artists, to me, are pretty dubious. Take Darius Rucker for instance...after hitting rock gold back in the mid 90's with Hootie and the blowfish...he's trying to reinvent himself as a solo in country. Trying to cross over when you've already had some success, predominately will be because your career has stalled and you gotta try a new tact. Cletus tried the "pop" route this year with "defying sales" and I would certainly call it a failure. Now take swift...she's fortunate, she's just hit the big time with phenomenal success and she's 19...so she already has "pop appeal" to the tweens and teens who could care less if she's categegorized as country... pop...rock or even Raggae, mon! So she will win that MTV award...and she will next host and perform on SNL... And plainly...42 year old cletus will never transition into that "poppy" scene!

Choice said...

Good to see the favourite tracksuit 1/2 pants are getting a look-in again. I've missed seeing those. Notice the hair extensions got the day off though?

http://nicole-kidman-journey.blogspot.com/

maclen said...

Choice said...
"Good to see the favourite tracksuit 1/2 pants are getting a look-in again. I've missed seeing those. Notice the hair extensions got the day off though?"

Ha! I think almost as offensive as the high as a kite orb's awkward groping for the benefit of the paps...is the sight of kidman's boney, blindingly pale calves and her quarter sized ankles! As Ive commented before...she gives "bag ladies" a bad name! As to kidman's "hair extensions" I am really tickled by how impressed the fansies are by them! "Ooooohhhh, her hair looks flawless!

Choice said...

So true Maclen - the fans actually believe all of the hair she was wearing at Congress was really hers. Real horse hair, if anything. Did you see Lainey's comment about the hair at Congress? Something along the lines of 'complete with extensions, a bit of extra volume helps'

Seriously, if she aint happy with the hair she has, why not just not appear anywhere at all?

maclen said...

Choice said...
"So true Maclen - the fans actually believe all of the hair she was wearing at Congress was really hers. Real horse hair, if anything. Did you see Lainey's comment about the hair at Congress? Something along the lines of 'complete with extensions, a bit of extra volume helps'"

Clearly, kidman is reduced to the level of lyndsey lohan...simply jumping from one staged event to the other! And lohan also barely gets film roles these days. As Ive speculated, I believe her supposed "ready to go" next film Danish Girl wont even begin production til kidman's other film Rabbit Hole comes out...if it even get released! According to IMDB, there is still no US release date...could be that small problem of no "distributor!" Yet I did learn that rabbit hole does have a "foreign" firm for sales overseas...a firm called Affinity Intl... and in fact I also noticed at IMDB that rabbit hole does have a foreign release date...Feb 12, 2010...in Brazil...and that's it! And of course I'm willing to bet once rabbit hole comes to a brazilian theater...and more than likely your nearest dvd rental store, danish girl fizzles without a trace!

maclen said...

...ps...

...a few cases in point...the evidence keeps rolling in...

http://www.news.com.au/couriermail/story/0,23739,26271915-7642,00.html

Baz Luhrmann, Nicole Kidman, Hugh Jackman snubbed by AFI

"AUSTRALIA may have raked in over $37 million at the box office, but its big-ticket stars Nicole Kidman and Hugh Jackman have been overlooked for nominations in the 2009 AFI Awards, announced in Sydney this afternoon"..."Baz Luhrmann’s war-time epic Australia is in the running for eight AFI gongs, including Visual Effects, Best Original Music Score, Best Costume Design and Best Supporting Actor for young star Brandon Walters."..."But while the film is among the favourites in the AFI Members’ Choice Award category, it has been snubbed in the Best Film, Director and Actor categories."

Clearly, how could they NOT nominate the flick called "AUSTRALIA"... but clearly they were not too impressed with the supposed "creative" forces behind the film! And surely, the bazz vowing to never...ever...make another film with kidman...or jackman ridiculing his role in the film at the oscars is all the indication that it was just a simple failure...
...and also, along the lines of my past comment on charlize theron being considered for a new mad max film...and why kidman would never...ever...be considered for an aussie based film...here is this...with even a jab at kidman herself..

http://www.news.com.au/entertainment/story/0,28383,26271115-7485,00.html

British, American actors considered for lead role in fourth Mad Max film

"It is 24 years since audiences watched the post-apocalyptic anti-hero on the big screen. And while Aussie fans hope to see Sam Worthington fill the screen in the lead role, his busy 2010 film schedule may prohibit him from being involved.
Miller knows too well the sting of criticism concerning Australian actors and their failed attempts at pulling off American and English accents.
He was roundly criticised for the accents in Happy Feet, with Nicole Kidman's character voice a peculiar high-pitched Americanesque hybrid."

It seems the aussie press has really soured on "our Nic" haven't they?

maclen said...

And here is part "trois" of the "lack of film roles for kidman due to...box office failure...onset behavior...etc"...
I was drowsing my usual political blogs when I came upon this article...

http://coronacomingattractions.com/news/exclusive-test-screening-review-fair-game

Exclusive: Test screening review of Fair Game

Fair Game is the bio pic based on the memoirs of outed secret CIA agaent Valerie Plame. Recall it was announced early last year in feb that kidman had been "outed" for the starring role...

http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/jumper/news/1708886/doug_liman_talks_valerie_plame_biopic

Doug Liman Talks Valerie Plame Biopic"

...and at the time director lima was like...totally gung ho on kidman doing the film!

"Nicole Kidman. She's perfect if you've ever met Valerie. Nicole was supposed to play Jane Smith in 'Mr. and Mrs. Smith.' We owe a movie together! That's an unrequited thing between me and an actor where I fell in love with them for a role and never get to consummate it.""

..yeah, he was all set to "consummate" his "unrequited thing" for kidman! Well, then flash forward a year...to Feb of 2009...

http://www.ihatethemedia.com/now-sean-penn-is-hot-for-valerie-plame

Now Sean Penn is hot for Valerie Plame

"Producers are negotiating with Sean Penn to play Ambassador Joe Wilson. Naomi Watts is set to star as Plame. Doug Liman, director of “Mr & Mrs Smith,” will direct this one, too."

And suddenly, kidman is out, and watts is in...with no fanfare...no press announcement. But apparently, and I'm sure at the time I mentioned the meaning of Penn's "involvement" with the film... and kidman's sudden "non involvement!"
As you'll recall, penn blasted kidman in a rolling stone interview...

http://www.rollingstone.com/rockdaily/index.php/2009/02/06/sean-penn-the-story-behind-the-story/

"In his Rolling Stone interview, Penn complains about the level of commitment showed by some of his fellow actors. “People are spending too much time modeling for some fucking clothing company instead of acting, and I resent that,” Penn told Binelli. “It’s like ‘I’m sorry— are you going to do the Chanel ad today? I thought you were in the middle of shooting a fucking movie.’” While Penn didn’t name names, Binelli thinks this was a veiled dig at actress Nicole Kidman. “They did that movie The Interpreter together, and right around that same time she became the face of Chanel,” Binelli says."

And coincidently, this Rolling stone interview came out in Feb '09...the exact same month that it was announced penn was in for the plame flick... and watts was in as Plame herself...and of course, kidman was OUT! It is now clear kidman is losing out on roles for her rep as a box office dud... and also for her now notorious "onset" behavior...for also do not forget the woody allen film she apparently had...then lost in what seemed like a matter of months! No doubt she was ridiculously demanding in her terms and perks to do the film, and woody passed on her involvement!

hoosierlady said...

For what it is worth,

I think the picture on the left was completely staged.

I think the picture on the right is a show of genuine affection.

Anonymous said...

For what its worth, I think all their pictures are staged, including these two.

Choice said...

Maclen - Rabbit Hole must be down the ditch already if only Brazil is brave enough to show it. Kidman will just tell everyone it was a personal project and only intended as an arthouse arty farty thing, not for mass audiences. Bla.

Interesting stuff about Sean Penn. I always wondered why such a brilliant actor like him would even do the Interpreter with Lady Kidman. She stunk in that film, and Im 100% sure his comments about modelling were aimed at her. I just wish he'd mentioned the fake ponytail in Chanel so it was definitely clear for the Kidman fans!!!

maclen said...

Choice said...
"Maclen - Rabbit Hole must be down the ditch already if only Brazil is brave enough to show it. Kidman will just tell everyone it was a personal project and only intended as an arthouse arty farty thing, not for mass audiences. Bla."

Clearly its a huge fall when you recall 2 years ago she had 3 films released that year...and made 15-17 mil for the massive summer flop, Invasion...and then her other winter fantasy epic fizzled...and even sandwiched in between those two her "awards" bait Margot was met with huge indifference! Last year was a huge gamble to cash in...she thought that by going the "all aussie, all the time" she could work that novelty. ANd now it's just a question if her film will even get released! And of course I see the same trajectory for the orb...as his cd has fallen once again this week 5 spots, from #73 to #78...while swifts previous cd fell only one spot form #59 to #60 and her current cd..Fearless remains at #7 this week. Also, just caught swift on the Ellen show this morning...where she gave ellen a gift of her Platinum record for "Taylor Swift"...(because ellen threw swift a "record release party" on her show)... and TS has now sold 5 mil cds. And cletus cant even reach 1 mil anymore! So basically, I'm now predicting...IF...the cletus even releases another cd, I will be lucky to even sell 500K!

maclen said...

Ha! So heres a few promo photos of kidman's next flick... you know, "Madam Ambassador"...Little miss "concerned" who claimed “I can’t be responsible for all of Hollywood but I can certainly be responsible for my own career” when it comes to lalaland portraying women in a less than admiral light! Well here she is "vamping" it up with a few of her "hollywood" costars...

http://x17online.com/celebrities/nicole_kidman/the_cast_of_nine_heats_things_up-10292009.php

The Cast Of Nine Heats Things Up!

I'm sure these images empowers and gives those poor unfortunate women just the confidence they need to overcome...well, these type of exploitative and stereotypical images being whored out by "hollywood"...and of course, by kidman! Granted, there have been many of these kinds images to eminate from the industry...and also granted, there is pen cruz and fergie also engaging in it...but of course I dont ever recall cruz or fergie "comdemning" this sort of stuff! But it is typical of inept team kidman on the one hand placing her on one side of an issue...and then on the other, simply blowing the "public image" and simply violate that supposed stand! NO! She doesnt portray women in a exploitive or provocative light that may contribute to men believing that they could have possession or treat women in a shallow or demeaning manner! Let's see, the plot of Nine..."a world famous film director .... must balance the many women of his life, including his wife (Marion Cotillard), his mistress (Penelope Cruz), his film star muse (Nicole Kidman), his confidant and costume designer (Judi Dench), an American fashion journalist (Kate Hudson), the whore from his youth (Fergie) and his mother (Sophia Loren)."

...boy I bet this film goes down great in those countries where woman are very "subserviant" to men and who "MUST" cater to men... or those country's where no doubt it is very permissable to throw acid on a woman's face with no fear of retribution...like in PAKISTAN! I suppose some could take relief in that this film probably wont be shown in Pakistan!

Choice said...

Well maclen - I recall The Invasion, indeed. That stunk too, just like the wig she wore in it. I bet she is cheesed off that AFI Awards have not even included her as a nominee for Australia.

As for Taylor Swift, not a fan. Tried hard to listen to that album a few times, and it is aaaaawful. Still, she is young and appeals to a new audience. Keith, on the other hand, has done his dash by marrying Gran. Silly boy, he really thought the fans would appreciate that connection, but they didn't. Plus, you should never name an album after your wife.

maclen said...

Yeah, I'm not a country fan myself, Choice, so I dont listen to swifts music either. But she is just the best example of current success...and who knows, she may be over next year! But my point is, the orb IS over...and I do surely see it as an effect of hooking up with kidman! She is dull, boring, standoffish...uninteresting and clearly very uninspiring! And besides the fact that she only appears at such a small fraction of his live gigs...her being in attendence is simply tabloid news fodder. If the orb had simply hooked up with a normal, non show business woman, I truly believe he would not be in such a dire state in his career!

maclen said...

Ha! Another case in point...another rather lame account of the traveling poster children of the ridiculous! Straight from inept team kidman press release outlet...

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20316297,00.html

Caught in the Act!

Seems like People.com caught up with the irrelevantly dull couple at a concert...for...Kiss?! Oh yes, clearly an "enthusiastic" kidman kicked up her rather rigid and gangly feet to their toe tappers...and no doubt she truly just wanted to "rocknroll all night...and party everyday!" Cant wait to see the "Kiss army" out t see kidman's film....in Kiss makeup! But seriously, this reported account is no doubt the doing's of the cletus...of course you all recall the significance of Kiss during his recent tour...taylor swift pulled a rather impressive prank on the cletus involving dressing up as Kiss and walking on stage as the orb performed "Kiss a girl"...and in fact, that video is still the most viewed video at the orb's youtube page...even more views than the orbs own music video! Yeah, orb no doubt trying to keep that buzz up! Good luck with that...the "buzz" I mean...but once again I must highlight the fact that swift can even upstage the cletus at his own youtube channel!

timtam said...

"I bet she is cheesed off that AFI Awards have not even included her as a nominee for Australia."

Put down the remote Choice. You must be watching too many old episodes of Hey Hey. You and maclen are also dead set wrong on your Brazil theory, but you probably already know that

Anonymous said...

maclen, your comments about Kidman killing Keith's career are right on target. He must have expected that hooking up with her would add her millions of fans to his fan base. But it appears that his own fans left in droves right from the beginning. And it also appears that of her small fan base (which we know because she can't open a movie)few are supporting him. And now that he has incorporated her into his career and dedicates all his music to her, happy little tunes that only reflect the "perfect marriage" image, he seems to be turning off more and more of whats left of his own fans. So he seems to be derailing his career just as she did. But he also seems determined to go down with the ship. It will be interesting to see what 2010 brings for Kidman who apparently has no film offers and all her hopes rest on her performance in Nine, and Keith who unless he wins at the CMA's may find himself shopping for a new record label. While both can continue to make money, it seems their both so over!

Anonymous said...

Maclen, you're truly ignorant about the country music scene, and your fact-finding skills are non-existent.

You go on and on about Taylor's album sales.
Fact: Her debut album released in 2006 is certified 3x platinum. Carrie Underwood's debut album is certified 7x platinum. This is a direct apples-to-apples comparison of the sales figures of the young blondes.

Fact: Carrie Underwood's first album is 7x platinum, but her second album is not yet 3x platinum. That's more than a 50% drop. How come Maclen’s “statistical ANAL-ysis” did not pick up on this. The fact is, CD sales in general have dropped. Only a handful of performers across all genres like Taylor, Lady Gaga, etc continue to enjoy brisk sales because they cater to a demographic that was previously “under-served” by their genre. These performers are the exceptions.


So you thought Brad giving a truck to the millionth attendee in his current tour was “very generous”? Ha, that benefitted exactly 1 fan.
Fact: Yes, Keith had given away guitars at his shows. But that’s not all the freebies he gave his fans. At the beginning of the tour, Keith gave several “No Frills” concerts for FREE in six cities, with about 800 to 1000 attendees at each show. Thousands of his fans got to enjoy his live performance for free. Again, at the end of his North American tour, he gave a free performance in Nashville today. That’s a very generous guy as far as I’m concerned.

maclen said...

HA! Well, actually according to RIAA, it's 4 mil!

http://www.riaa.com/goldandplatinumdata.php?table=SEARCH_RESULTS&artist=Taylor%20Swift&format=ALBUM&go=Search&perPage=50

Artist
SWIFT, TAYLOR
Title
TAYLOR SWIFT Certification Date
08/17/2009 Label
BIG MACHINE RECORDS, INC.
Award Description
4.00x MULTI PLATINUM Format
ALBUM Category
SOLO Type
ST

...and according to Wiki...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Taylor_Swift_(album)

..."It has sold over 4,364,000 copies to date in the U.S.[5] It has been certified 4x Platinum by the RIAA.[6][7]"

...so my inadvertant total was only off by 635,000...which is still in the neighborhood of about 3.7 million more cds than the orbs!
Also according to RIAA...swifts current cd has also sold 4 mil!

http://www.riaa.com/goldandplatinumdata.php?table=SEARCH_RESULTS&artist=Taylor%20Swift&format=ALBUM&go=Search&perPage=50

Artist
SWIFT, TAYLOR
Title
FEARLESS Certification Date
09/10/2009 Label
BIG MACHINE RECORDS, INC.
Award Description
4.00x MULTI PLATINUM Format
ALBUM Category
SOLO Type
ST

..and also according to wiki...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fearless_(Taylor_Swift_album)

"According to Billboard, Fearless has sold 4,031,000 copies as of October 28, 2009[30]"

..and again, swift's current cd has sold about 3.4 mil than orb's current cd!

...shall I continue? Thank you...I think I shall! HA!

Anonymous said...

My point still holds true ... Taylor's debut album has sold far less than Carrie Underwood's debut album which has been certified 7x platinum. And a big part of Taylor's CD sales came about because of her cross-over to pop. As usual, Maclen, you can't handle the truth.

It's very interesting that in the last tour, you were singing the praises of Underwood. Now you just ignored her because of another younger blonde? Or is it because her second album sold less than half of her first album? Funny you did not mention her "declining sales".

So it will be interesting to see how long you will be singing Taylor's praises before another younger and blonder singer knock her off her pedestal.

JOY said...

Not being rude or anything but I really don't think that Taylor Swift sings well at all. I've read reviews from people who've attended her concerts & they said her singing was OK at best.

Now I have heard Keith Urban in concert & just got back from seeing him perform at the Grand Ole Opry & that man is not only a wonderful singer but he is a masterful guitar player and a poetic song writer. His fans get every penny's worth when they go to see him perform. He gives his all on stage & there should be no fan left feeling that they weren't entertained by one of the best. Also all over Nashville when we mentioned his name as to why we were there we heard nothing but positive comments about Keith. Every person we talked to raved about his friendliness & the way he likes to meet & greet as many fans as possible. They all say they are glad he lives near Nashville & goes there often. They like having him in their neighborhood. Can't say we heard all positive about some other country artists around town.

So chart positions & $$$ are not ALL there is about an artist' success, how they treat fans and how they relate to the public is very important. Keith will be around for a long time as a successful Country artist. He will outlast those who are just there for show.

maclen said...

JOY said...

"Not being rude or anything but I really don't think that Taylor Swift sings well at all. I've read reviews from people who've attended her concerts & they said her singing was OK at best.
Now I have heard Keith Urban in concert & just got back from seeing him perform at the Grand Ole Opry & that man is not only a wonderful singer but he is a masterful guitar player and a poetic song writer."

Yes...and I've also heard from his fans that he is an EXCELLENT "glass blower" and an crack "animal balloon maker"! Just joking, JOY...pardon my "sarcastic joshing"..for I too, like Urban Myths, appreciate your honesty and earnestness over your hero, Keith Urban. (There...I said it!) As an admitted fan, I have no doubt you believe that... that is your opinion...and more power to you. But as an admitted non fan of urban or country music, I feel I can jump around and tout say underwood a year ago, or swift this year and say..."They are outselling urban's cd" or that chesney is outgrossing urban in concert tours. Therefore they, before urban, may win or deserve to take "entertainer" at the CMA's. And I certainly take a far more "analytical" view on the yearly stats and sales and grosses of the past year. As I've mentioned, swift is outselling urban's cd....chesney is outgrossing him in tour gross...and according to Pollstar's "2009 top North American tours" urban is the 4th topping concert grosser, behind chesney...rascal flatts and paisley. (and paisley is only a mil or so higher than urban and paisley had 10 more dates than urban...so I didnt comment on it...although again, urban charges more for tickets than paisley!) So again, I believe you are sincere and earnest in your admiration of Urban, JOY, and all I'm saying is I'm sure cheney's, swift's, underwood's and paisley's fans would say the exact same things for their favorite as you are saying.